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Heyaa. Whatsup? Im currently watching AXN. Wipeout baby!
Hahah :P Before that, I was watching Kimora and Amazing Race.
Tomorrow ada party at Seria. Cant wait for that since its my last day in STAR.
And oh yeah, I got grade C. But thats okay.
Erm, what else? Ah! Ive just received an invitation birthday party card
for babyqah and Raziq's 6th and 4th birthday on 4th december which is going to be held at zyra's crib.
Right now, Im watching 'So you think you can dance?'
Wohoo, I cant miss this part! So be right back. Will update later. Bye ♥

Im back! Aaaaaah, im so obses of this guy in the tv show right now. His name is Nathan and he's smoking hot! Ergh! :P

Loveyou Nathan! Heheheh. ♥

Now Im currently chattin with 'someone' Naah, Im not going to mention his name here but for sure he's my friend :) He's nice, funny and he's good at cheering me up and that makes me love to share all my problems with him since he's a good listener and advicer too :D
We've been a good friends since Im with my exboyfriend, Rypeen and after I broke up with him, we lost contact. Now that I broke up with Bolhie, we're back in contacting to each other.

Sooooooooooooo, anyway next. Ergh, Its getting really lame for me for those who talk or text like "Sasak kali kau eh!" "Cam baie!" Apatah tu? Macam egh, so annoying :) Bidaa.
OH, this tuesday 30th November sign record. Wish me luck guys. Mudahan dapat markah yang cemerlang. Amen~.

So goodnight everyone. Sleep well and sweetdreams :)
Peace and love ♥

Me now.

Refa Zawanah is no longer listed as in a relationship..

Yeah, thats right. I just broke up with him and the last thing he said to me was,
Fa, for your own good, I let you go. I loveyou and goodbye.
Simple, isnt it? :)

Just like that :) AHAH.
Now tell me how hurt I am at that time? Heh, nobody care.
Yes, I know this is what I want which was stated on my previous post right? But this is not the way how I wanted it to be end! Fuck :)
Yee, Im cool.. And I know I should move on.

I cried hard, my eyes were surrounded red and puffy.
Its easy to let you go but, I miss what we had before. He used to tell me he loved me, but now he hardly ever even says hey. I just cant forget you :( But thats okay. I'll try..

And this quotes really makes me realize something.

"Dont be so quick to give your heart away because someone will take it and throw it away." Ashiquaye Hammond.

"Never make someone your everything, because if you lose them, you have nothing." Taylor Feye.

Why is life so cruel?

Tomorrow,
Dad's going home and Im going to meet Bolhie, InsyaAllah.

Huh, Im still not in a good mood right now. I dont know what I should do. Im blank.
I cant stop crying thinking about myself, I wonder, why I cant be like them? Like the other teenagers?
Is it because Im still young and not that old enough? Come on mom, dad. You surely know what It feels like me, when you're in your teenage life old years back? Right?

I wanna be like them, I just wanna have fun. I dont want this annoying and lame 'on mama papa's back' life. Please :/ I want FREEEEEEEEEE! Just free.

Your daughter need you guys to let her go and fly. Not living a life in a prison. I dont want this life mom, dad :( Please understand me, understand how I feel and what I really wanted. Thats all I need.  

After that incident, Im not sure if I still can be me. Im not sure if things going to be normal like it used to be. I dont have anyone to be on my back while Im in pain, while Im in need. :')
Im tired of being tired and Im sick of being sick.
These days, I rarely smile and maybe I should just give a fake smile instead :')
I really miss my smile and those laughter..

I felt like a jerk for not being strong enough to face all of this. So, Fuck it all..

Too much to tell

Ive got a lot to say all in my head.

Im weak, Im tired. And cold.

Refa zawanah Too much stories to tell but had no one to share with.

about an hour ago .Like 19 .Comment 2

I cant find myself. I dont know who I am :'(

I dont know what I want and what I need. Im lost, Ya Allah..

I hate mylife but I know I have to move on and not to give up..

Besfriends, I really hope that they can hear my stories like I always did to them. Be a good listener and advicer. Where were them when I need them the most? :(

Mom, I dont feel like I can share my stories with you anymore, Im confused. I dont know, it feels like you never know how I actually feel :'(

Dad, I guess you never wanted to treat me like Im your own daughter.

I had no one,

I dont write diaries and I only share my secrets with Tommy; My beloved cat.

Im still young to face all of this, I just wanna have fun :'(

Too much problems stucked in my head and I burried all the emotions by myself and let it hurt me.

Now tell me how can I handle all of those. Im not strong enough.

Well I guess, its time to face the truth.

Im a poor girl, and its just me against this world. Just me.

No one needs me cause Im all useless.

Everything seemed perfect and clear. Then it all changed.

I cant do this anymore../ :(

Goodmorning!

GOOD MORNING SUNSHINE

Hewoooo :D Today morning, I woke up at 7.01 Am and my phone buzzez.

1 misscall from Bolhie. Haha, then I continue to sleep for few minutes.

Afterthat, I on my facebook and I received 1 inbox. Its from Qaah, she told me to check out this blog which ada gambar my friend's wedding so I turn on the computer and straight away buka blog.

Yeeee, there's alot of pictures of them. Then as usual, updating my blog. Hehe :D

Then clean up my bedroom and shower.
I eat nasi goreng and half cooked eggs for breakfast :D

Ah, and 1 more thing. My finger's hurt! And my arms too ;(

I cant even move my finger woah.

Last night's dream was weird. Really weird :/

So yeah, forget it. Update later :D

Peace and love.  

Randomzzz

Sleeping with band dudes doesnt make you famous. -Nothing personal ♥

Cut you hair. You look ridiculous ♥

Where is my vodka? ♥

But whatever you wear, dress to kill ♥

I may look calm but in my head, Ive killed you three times. ♥

Save your lies, Im not buying any of it. Not anymore. ♥

Wild hearts cant be broken. ♥

ez

Cycling. Cycling and cycling :)

 ♥

Just killed an ant.  R.I.P

Tahlil later~

I wanna eat cupcakes :3 Reallyyyyyyy.

♥♥♥♥

   Refa zawanah Things went up and down..
   4 hours ago via Mobile web .Like 8 .Comment.

                                                

♥

Everyone says that love hurts, but thats not true.

Loneliness hurts, rejection hurts,

losing someone hurts.

Everyone confuses these with love,

but in reality LOVE is the only thing in this world that

covers up all the pain & make us feel wonderful again..♥♥

I smile when my phone buzzes,
because I know its you ♥

Some guy asks me,
"What does he have that I dont?"
&& I reply,
"My heart" ♥

Goodnight, sweetdreams and sleep well everyone :)

Peace and love.